Greetings to all of you loyal, misled, poor tortured souls who call yourselves Cleveland Browns fans.
The light struggles to fight it’s way through the smog, remnants of a history of manufacturing, as the sun rises on another early morning in the city of Cleveland. Through the haze, one can make out the shadow of Cleveland Browns stadium…one of the saddest, most desolate places on Earth.
Before I continue, let me introduce myself as a life-long Cleveland sports fan. I grew up on the legendary feats of the likes of Bob Feller and Jim Brown, told to my brothers and I by my grandfather Richard. I remember attending the final 3 Tribe games in the old Municipal stadium. I have sat through countless miserable, snow-covered, windy Sundays watching horrible quarterbacks, inept offenses, and questionable coaching staffs that have less talent than my little finger, trying to engineer a 24 point fourth quarter comeback while paying for 7 dollar beers in hopes of making the pain go away. I even attended Kent State University in Northeast Ohio earning my Bachelor’s degree in an uninspired 5 year campaign.
But the reasons above offer no excuses that can vindicate my support for this franchise. Like the rest of you, I too have been led astray. But unfortunately and for reasons I cannot explain, I am still here, but my support is wavering.
With the NFL draft less than 2 weeks away, what, if anything, can we expect from this season’s Cleveland Clow…I mean, Browns?
Positions of need: Everywhere??? The draft should include coaches and front office personnel. Now that would be more valuable than Andrew Luck or RG3. How good can any individual team or player be with an incompetent coaching staff? Although I do believe sound leadership is finally visible with Mike Holmgren and Tom Heckert, Pat Shurmur is a no-talented ( fill-in-the-blank ) clown (thank you Mike Judge and Office Space). Before all of you armchair quarterbacks out there sitting in your parents’ basement with nothing else to do start an uproar in response to this post, I understand he played 4 years of college football for Michigan State and has been coaching in some capacity for 23 years, 12 of the those years in the NFL.
He has been involved in the this game almost as long as I have been alive…I played one year of football in 7th grade as a tiny, pre-pubescent tailback who got his rear-end handed to him without getting much (if any) playing time, so yes, he is more of an authority on the game than I, so please don’t get your panties in a bunch…oh, and get a job!
However, with his bumbling and poor decision making throughout last season, it is not a stretch for me to say that his performance was far from inspiring and doesn’t exactly warrant the confidence you would like to have in your head coach. He’ll be gone after this season as Mike Holmgren will be forced to come down from the box to clean up this terrible decision. Anyways, back to the draft and our team.
We have three legitimate impact players: Phil Dawson, Joe Haden, and Joshua Cribbs (with the new return rule implemented last year, his role in this category is questionable). If you look at any other team in the league, a kicker and corner-back will not be at the top of this list…game over, end of discussion.
So, what to do with our picks this year? Stay at number 4 and select an elite player or trade back for more picks? Our choices in the first round amidst trade talks or staying at the 4 position are: A). QB (Tannehill, Wheeden, or Cousins) B). RB (TRich, Lamar Miller, or David Wilson) C). CB (Morris Claiborne and his outstanding wonderlic scores).
My answer…Who cares. Regardless of the outcome of the draft, fans, media, players, ticket holders, etc. will be disappointed. There are too many holes on this roster that an elite prospect or a quick fix through free agency can plug. After the first 3 games, people will already start looking forward to next year.
My advice, execute a trade to drop back a few places and swoop up Claiborne. He is possibly border-line mentally challenged but the dude can play and our secondary would be solid for the next few years with Haden, T.J. Ward, and Claiborne. With the 22 pick, grab a receiver…actually scratch that. Draft a Punter. That’s right folks, a punter. Field position is our livelihood so let’s ensure that we have the Sebastian Janokowski of punters.
It’s not sexy, but at this point, who really expects anything sexy from the Browns.
A long snapper should be my suggestion for the next pick in the second round (see the punter comment above).
After that, take whatever is available with the remaining picks.
I’m sorry if this article seems harsh. Yes, I am a Browns fan. But above all, I am a realist. The days of me cheering for this team year in and year out based on blind faith and unrealistic expectations are over.
I’m reminded of family vacations when I was a kid. My dad would be driving, my mom in the front seat, and my brothers and I sitting in the back of our Mark 111 Astrovan.
Eventually, one of us, frustrated and restless from hours spent in the car would say, ”Are we there yet?”
Browns fans: The answer is NO. Unfortunately, our road to success, better yet, respectability is still far, far away.
Enjoy another 6-10 campaign and I’ll see you next year for the Matt Barkley sweepstakes.
Marcus Gorman
